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Mercury retrograde always provides ample fodder for the 'why did I do that?' file. Take, for instance, these examples sent to me via email from friends during the most recent MR:

Tried to start my car this morning by putting the key in the seat belt slot.

I was going to put a pre-written $99 check in a door payment slot, but I almost inserted a $20 bill instead.

Sorting through my car's glove compartment looking for an important paper only to locate it 10 minutes later in my mouth where I was temporarily holding it while searching.

I was using a hair dryer but noticed my hair wasn't getting dry. Then I looked in the mirror. It helps to point the device towards your head instead of away from it.

Never wrap your 'popped-off' molar crown in a tissue and then just stuff it in your purse...because sooner or later you will clean out your purse and think the tissue is used and without thinking you'll discard it.

That, in fact, should be the buzz word for Mercury retrograde: WITHOUT THINKING!

By far, the most frustrating part of this particular MR for me was the 'dreaded computer dilema.' That's code for "please, just shoot me." My nearly 2-year-old netbook got a virus and over the course of a week decided to eventually give up the ghost. Of course stuff like this only happens to me when I have no funds to buy another outright. Since my connection to the internet was also embedded in this device, so too did my ability to access the web, die. So I frantically drive to my internet provider store to see if they can transfer my 2 remaining months under contract with them to a different computer. Pretty simple, eh? NOT! All they want to do is 'upgrade me', thus creating a totally new 2-year contract that I didn't want or need. By the way, since my provider no longer provides 'unlimited' monthly access I would be paying up the Yin-Yang from now until eternity for the amount I formerly used. WHAT? Perish the thought. Read my lips; that isn't what I asked for.

So I packed up my beleaguered puter and my meager budget and set out on uncharted waters. I promptly traveled to another internet provider store and within 10 minutes had a 3G/4G- capable USB plug-in antenna with UNLIMITED access. Take THAT former internet provider customer service!

Feeling a sense of relief was only temporary, though, as I went home to resuscitate 1 of 2 other laptops that were, heretofore, declared deceased by 2 highly-trained computer professionals that specialize in diagnosing the 'dead.' Somehow I was able to resurrect one but my fingers are crossed. For some reason the letter 'L' on the keyboard is slightly higher than the rest of the keys so if I don't hold my hands just so over it lthen llllllllllllllllll my ltyping wouldl lin all actualllity loolk like thisl! After playing musical chairs with the 3 laptops I owned, plus 2 I didn't and many hours of troubleshooting interspersed with very colorful language that only drunken sailors use...I finally have a system that works (I think)...

Never a dulll moment with Merclury reltroglrade!

©2011 Debbie Ballard